Try this:
Look at your feelings as an observer with curiosity. Notice the ‘sensation’ they create, as in, how you recognize something as a ‘feeling’. What sensation is happening inside your body: waves, tingling, thudding, sinking, fluttering, pulsating? Where do you feel this in your body? Does it move around, or stay in one spot? Does it come and go? Does it have heat or a color attached? (Note: black and white are also colors). Just welcome and tune into any sensations. No need to question them, nor try to change them. Just sit with them, notice, be present with them, allowing them to be there, just “feeling” them.
Then notice what happens as you don’t suppressing, fight, ignore or resist them, nor try to label or question them. Let the sensations come and go, and just breathe along as you stay present, focussed on any sensations inside. Following them with your concentration.
Welcome anything that wants to be there, allow it to be big as it wants to be right there and then in that safe space, as if the sensations are a good friend, and you have created time and space to just listen to them vent. Here, is where the magic happens.
As you welcome the sensations (or feelings), and connect with them, rather than disconnect through resisting, fighting, ignoring or trying to push them down or to the side, you will now start to reconnect with the gift they are, allowing them to be the helping messengers they actually are.
A small little piece of us, an inner compass if you will, here to directly communicate to us as possible imbalances away from inner peace occur in our lives, aiming to give us that message, to guide us back toward harmony within ourself. They work for us, with us, not against us.
Feelings don’t over-take us if we give them time, acknowledgement and space to be felt. Their job is to deliver us a message, once heard the voice subsides, then we are left with a sense of calm, and connection within to decide with our conscious minds what, or even if there needs to be anything done with that message.
Example, I need to express my truth with my partner, or boss, or friend. Yes it’s true, this might be a challenge, but this is what your body is telling you, listening to it takes courage, to hear your truth and act on it, it takes courage. But being connected to yourself gives you so much strength, and peace within. It’s time to build a new relationship with “feelings”.
It makes sense when you think about how our feelings and relationships were sculpted and measured by our child selves. However, now we know more about ourselves, about life, and about falsified fears. I encourage you to build an adult relationship with your feelings, re-sculpt and re-measure them by feeling them as an adult, as if you are feeling them for the first time, by just tuning in to your “sensations”. With each wave of energy, welcome it to be there. Just feel it. Do nothing more until it subsides, then you will be left with the peacefulness to act on those needed to, but from a good and connected place. By changing my relationship to feelings, I changed the way they communicated with me. They no longer had to scream loudly, and overtake, because I listened intently.
They could now whisper and I heard (quickly) so they could quietly leave. Both the ‘feeling’ and I left content, and I found peace with myself. I no longer saw some as “bad” rather uncomfortable, and shifting that perception willed me to just sit in that uncomfortability quite effortlessly, allowed it to pass as it surely did every time. Feelings became less scary, and then occurred less, with less strength each time. Those that lingered were those that needed to be followed up with an action to get me back into harmony.
For example, the sensation which we have labelled ‘anxiety’ and we often hear a lot of negativity around; How did “anxiety” feel to me. How did I feel it- it was a moving pressure, with weight, and a sinking feeling in sand then a hood being pulled over me, then quickly lifted again without warning or my control. I felt off balance and dizzy almost. It mostly pressurised my chest and throat, it moved fast, prominently with weight, so I followed it with my attention, I was present with it, connecting to it, watching how it moved within me, where it moved within me, feeling its energy, its waves, its weight, almost as if I was on a ride at a carnival.
I welcomed it all, this “anxiety” allowing it to be there and as big as it wanted to be (be that as big as my body, the room, the neighbourhood, the country, the world) moving how it wanted, where it wanted, and I just breathed whilst staying in tune with it, and before I knew it it was gone. I couldn’t feel it or find it anywhere. As if it were my troubled friend, who once I had listened to them vent, they felt better and their mood changed, the pressure lifted, and they felt calm and understood, only now, this time, I had truly listened to myself. My body. My “emotions”. And one I had been scared of, but why? Here I saw, It wasn’t so bad at all.
I didn’t try to change it, ignore it, I just stayed patient and present, and it moved through me then left me. Afterward I had space in me, clarity to think – ok, what was it that caused that reaction in me? When did it start? Was it that person, situation or thought that I had to look more closely at? Did I need to change or do something?
Usually this was the case, I had to make a change, have a conversation, admit to a feeling I had deep down, a truth I knew but found difficult to admit (to myself usually often never even needing to express to someone else). But I could now see it, and it became easier and easier to experience feelings in a new way, in a fun way, I listened to them, and learned from them. Hear their message they were gifting me to help me stay in a state of harmony, because in anxiety’s case, it came in when I hadn’t been listening to other less charged “feelings” I had also ignored. In my case, it was a friend I had to now break-up with who no longer added to my life or aligned with me anymore. A hard thing to admit to myself, and a tricky thing to do. But for my own worth was necessary, and my life lifted once I had a heartfelt chat admitting it to her, and more importantly myself that “I need to take some space” and that’s ok. Hard, but worth it. Life- changing! The anxiety that crept in when around her or thoughts of her (sometimes unconscious) completely lifted.
Taryn Jade, Made Hot Coach
Instagram : @tarynjade_tj
Facebook : https://www.facebook.com/healingswithtarynjade/
Bio : Taryn Jade believes that we are all born with strong intuition and all-favorable emotions. When we embrace that, we become our own inner compass, cleverly allowing us to give “the self” what it needs, for ease. Our bodies have the miraculous ability to heal themselves, but this connection to ease is often a lost art caused by a lack of understanding and incomprehension. There is no “one way” or “right way” when it comes to healing. Taryn will guide, teach and support you on a personal development journey that’s unique to you.
SUPER POWER : Revealing I am merely a tool. It’s you who seeks & does the work!
